Truly Human

Molly Sarle sings a song called “Human”. (I’ll insert a link later. Note to self.) I thought of it when thinking about the writing #prompt5 issued last month on Mathstodon.xyz. I also thought of how my humanity shows daily in class as I unabashedly make errors. But the aspect of how I bring humanity into the classroom I’ve wrestled with is loving my learners. I’ve always loved learning and maths, but loving my learners takes more of myself than I was willing to give for many years.

I didn’t think love belonged in a classroom. I intentionally avoided the word itself in my room. Then, one day, I heard my most respected colleague talking with her class and she told them she loved them. I could not believe what I was hearing and feeling. I felt sincerity and calm. I longed for that very feeling in my space. My love of maths must extend to the humans all around me. I intentionally fell in love with my students and worked hard to show that love to them and my class changed. I changed.

It’s hard to be sad when I sing and it’s also hard to be sad when I love. My room becomes a much happier place. I am more relaxed and confident and so were my students. Everybody wins and nobody gets hurt. Well, that’s not exactly true. I get hurt sometimes, but that is the price of loving. Sometimes it hurts.

Students are human too and sometimes they do stupid things. They may be unkind, unwelcoming, and even unlovable. They do things that piss me off. They may break in half the new pencil I loaned them rather than returning it to me. They may interrupt learning for others with silly distractions. They may even cheat — which is what I despise most—but, it is much easier to forgive and move forward when I come from a position of love.

So, how do I go about loving in my classroom? I am patient. I know —me patient. It’s a new thing I’ve been working on. I smile, greet, help, forgive, and once I know my students, I even tell them I love them. Not too soon. I must know them, warts and all, first. Love is not a word I share lightly. It’s not fairy dust that makes my room a magical place. It is a word that conveys with sincerity I will do anything I can to help my learners learn. I treat them with the most precious human feeling of all. Love.